Ruth Stoops

Is this it?  Steady contractions for over 12 hours, increasing in number and intensity….sounds like it might be.  I still have my doubts.  It might be another 3 weeks!  I can still talk through the tightening, they aren’t really consistent, no plug, show or water.  But in case this really is the beginning of the end, here are my thoughts:

What a blessing it has been to carry this boy.  My pregnancy has brought so many gifts.  I have had to learn to love myself and my body, because I love this child that is so interconnected with both.  My thoughts, diet, rest and movements have affected him each day and my awareness of this has changed the way I treat myself.  I am more gentle, patient, and balanced.  Despite all the raging hormones running rampant in our house, Layne and I are communicating better than we ever have.  I have learned to trust God to do the impossible - with our finances, with my marriage, with the constant battle for peace in my mind.

It is a good thing that the past few weeks have been so uncomfortable - otherwise I would not want this to end!  I LOVE feeling my son move.  I feel honored to carry this big belly full of baby.  This has been a precious time, full of wonder and joy.  When I feel that overwhelming sense that I am not “ready” to be a mother, I remind myself that I have been Mother to this child since his beginning.  The transformation in my heart and life will continue, and I have been given all that I need to move into this new life with our boy.

I cannot wait to meet him.  Come soon, baby!

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